Letters to Luthien

Letters to My Future Bride

#18: To Grow Old Together

“Remember when
We said when we turn gray
When the children grow up and move away
We won’t be sad, we’ll be glad
For all the life we’ve had…
And we’ll remember when.”
Alan Jackson 

Did you know your grandparents?

I never did. Not really. One set of grandparents was mean and unkind and distant. The other died when I was too little to appreciate their presence and influence in my life.

I don’t know what it’s like to have extended family that cares, that can fill that loving, indulgent role mythologized by movies and comics. I don’t know what it’s like to go over to the grandparents’ for Christmas, or to have Grandma fix a plate of cookies. I’ve never had someone to model that “aged love.”

Yeah, kind of sad.

But aren’t old couples wonderful to watch? Don’t they give you hope and restore your faith in a love that lasts? There’s plenty of old couples I run into, especially at church or work. They fascinate me, and I get along with them better than most of my own peers. Old couples are like living history. Their memories reach decades into the past, to a time which you and I can only read about in encyclopedias.

There’s nothing more beautiful to see than an old couple still in love: wrinkled lips that still kiss affectionately, wizened hands that still reach for each other, every little action and gesture that has weathered the storms and found to be true by test of time.

Who wouldn’t want that kind of love?

That’s what I want our love to be. No one can promises how long we’ll walk the earth. Truthfully dear, I’m inclined to burn up this body and this life in bright service for the King. I may arrive in my coffin a little earlier than most, and perhaps a little more worn, but that is not mine to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. All I can do is my King’s bidding.

But I promise you now, that for whatever span of years God gives us, I will spend them with you.

I promise we will grow old together.

In the eyes of the world, time will wear away whatever beauty you or I may have had. That’s why they say beauty is only skin-deep…the skin wears out. Our hair will thin and turn gray, our bodies will grind down from the years’ decay. That’s why it’s been so hard to find you, my darling. If I looked no further than the surface, it would have been easy. We have to be able to look past all that, even when beauty glows brightly. We have to be sure we have loved more than just that which fades.

“Deep hearts, sage minds, take life as God has made it; it is a long trial, an incomprehensible preparation for an unknown destiny. This destiny, the true one, begins for a man with the first step inside the tomb. Then something appears to him, and he begins to distinguish the definitive. The definitive, meditate upon that word. The living perceive the infinite; the definitive permits itself to be seen only by the dead. In the meanwhile, love and suffer, hope and contemplate. Woe, alas! to him who shall have loved only bodies, forms, appearances! Death will deprive him of all. Try to love souls, you will find them again.” – Victor Hugo

I’m looking for the soul that burns straight and true, the soul I can find again, whose unending devotion and service will not dim with the passing of years, and who is not afraid to step into life’s twilight if she walks with her Lord and with her husband.

For the measure of grace our Lord gives us, I will indeed walk those years with you.

I promise.

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March 19, 2012 - Posted by | Promises

1 Comment »

  1. […] We’ll walk side by side through the days, weeks, months and years to come, on our way to growing old together. […]

    Pingback by In Anticipation of…Walking With You « Letters to Luthien | May 22, 2012 | Reply


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